2017.09.22

Two days ago MW fell down the stairs. Yesterday she burned her hand on the toaster oven.

Whatever. Monsters says The Big Lie must be maintained!

Neither incident was too bad. Again, the fall was more a controlled tumble. MW was two steps from the floor, her foot slipped, and she collapsed backwards. She held the rail for the most part and wound up harmlessly on her butt. Nothing broken, twisted, or even bruised but pride. And psyche.

And she accidentally closed the oven door by touching glass instead of handle. Scorched fingertips, that's all. She did, however, call me at the office after it happened; crying so bad I could barely understand her.

Nerve-wracking.

But Wayne, you exclaim, surely you can't continue to lie about her condition! Why, MW herself must suspect the truth! She can't work, can barely function around the house, and now she's routinely having accidents which are just shy of disaster. She needs help and by denying her that help, you're going to cause serious injury or worse.

Yeah. Well. Monster says fuck you.

And if you're wondering how I am even able to maintain the lie after these two catastrophic events; once again I credit reverse gas-lighting and my well-honed ability to work within MW's dementia parameters.

When I got home from work yesterday and MW was still talking about the toaster-oven, I admit I was very close to defeat. I'd drunk some vodka to prepare for the evening and was feeling down and fuzzy. Then MW actually said, on her own without any prompting, "My mother never burned herself. And she was in the kitchen all the time."

And I smiled. Of course not. Your mother never fell either.

Therefore, you don't have Huntington's Disease.

Beautiful.

****

Work is another issue. They want me to travel to New York for training. I told my boss, in the vaguest terms, that I can't travel because I'm a care-giver. He didn't push for details and said it wasn't a problem, but then he called back and asked if I could make a session in Dallas. I told him I'd let him know, but haven't had the courage to ask MW if she'd allow the day-trip yet.

Thinking on it, I'm not even going to bother. I know the answer. So, once again, I'll have to tell my boss that I can't perform the duties of my job.

Not sure how long I can keep that going.