This time, however, she asked them to stay at our house for the weekend. And they said yes.
Great. So now what the fuck do I do?
My first thought was to contact them behind MW's back and ask them, please, don't come; but I couldn't trust them not to turn around and call MW back to bitch at her about it.
Also, MW seems excited about seeing these family members as they aren't part of the branch that she's totally cut off. So it would be pretty awful of me to keep them apart.
Still. What the fuck am I going to do? Already MW is worried about how she's going to sleep and eat when they're here. Right now she's sleeping on a mattress on the floor of the sitting room surrounded by sofas so she can't bump her head, but she can't let them see that. It will all have to be moved. But she can't take it upstairs because she might trip going up and down; plus it's too dark in those closed off rooms. Currently the thought is we just won't sleep the two days they're here. I guess that might work.
And then there's the food situation to consider. This summer has been terrible for MW's diet. Already two of her staples - a frozen meal and a particular type of fish - have been discontinued from the grocery store. Finding replacements has not been easy. It is a lot of trial and error and, literally, visiting every grocery store in our area looking for that one, specific meal. Yeah, I did go on-line to check, but MW doesn't always trust the internet, so.... What if, when her cousins are here, she can't find the food she needs? They can't know that her diet is so rigid, so how will she eat? We won't be able to spend the entire day driving from one store to the next searching for food if they're with us.
Also, let's not forget the messy house. MW can't let them see how we live, and that's going to be extremely difficult to deal with. She did call a plumber to replace the dirty toilette, so that'll be okay; but what about the rest of it? We can't replace the entire house.
But above all this, my biggest fear is that something dangerous will be said during their visit. It might be well-intended - "have you lost weight?" - which, even though said to be kind, would still send MW into a spiral of fear and doubt. Worse, however, would be if they ask MW about her other family relationships; "Why haven't you seen your dad in three years? Why aren't you talking to your brother?"
This could lead to a conversation with disastrous consequences. No overstatement. If I'm not around or unable to redirect these types of inquiry, it could end.... everything.
I do not trust any of MW's family members. They are willfully and cruelly ignorant of the symptoms of Huntington's Disease. In the past, when MW first expressed her concerns to them, they responded flippantly, then turned to belligerence when she wasn't placated by their platitudes.
Fuck 'em.
Now the cousin coming to our house is younger and, I hope, more tactful. Indeed, he is the child of MW's aunt who also has the disease. He, apparently, made some waves when he married outside his religion (a Hindu girl!) and rumor has it he's given up faith in God. Something about what kind of God would allow this! I've got an answer for him, but he probably wouldn't like it.
Anyway, he's also smart as a whip; an Emergency Room doctor, and, as I said, much younger. So I doubt he would go off on MW about her behavior, at least not deliberately, but the fact that they have a shared family history is causing me great anxiety. And it's not just a one-way street. MW has a tendency to take conversations to strange places. She may push him into a corner where he has no choice but to talk about things best left unsaid.
I can't control what he'll say. And that scares me to death.
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